Chances of finding your soulmate in China?
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Aqu5HHyM043DDI4EVSH5aNrty6IX?qid=20070826103714AAULz8p
As you can see I will be going to China in a year or two. Now going to there to find a woman is NOT my main reason to go, as I could just as easily find one down here in Texas.(There are many asian women around here) Going to China has always been a dream of mine, as I love their culture so much. But it wouldn’t hurt to meet a nice girl there too, and bring her back to the states with me. Money is not a problem for me, most women everywhere want a man with money, and I can understand the whole passport thing as well. But my question is, are the Chinese women in China, who do date foreigners, interested in lifelong marriage? Or is it just a one night stand sort of thing?
I live in China as an ex pat and am prime marrying material, but I can’t find that one special woman and here are the reasons.
#1 I have no problem dating, even finding lovers.
#2 I am 56, most say I look early 40’s, average build a little on the slim side. Average height for China, a bit below for the states. Am told I am “very handsome.” but I think that is a bit of a lie.
#3 Tradition is very strong where I live in the central part of China. Parents, friends, and their way of life really gets in the way of finding a lifelong mate. As they age and either loose their husband because of death, or divorce, then it becomes more acceptable for them to marry me. But there are some big problems answered below.
#4 The young, many can speak English, as they age it become less to the point where its almost non existent.
#5 Chinese is one of the most difficult languages to learn. I have big problems even getting the tones right for one word, let alone whole sentences.
#6 If I meet someone that could be the one I’m looking for I never dangle the “I am rich” or “Move to America” carrot in front of their face. I quickly find out their motives. (a warning at the end of this)
#7 The ones that come from the big cities, such as Shanghai, are more liberal in their thinking, so for me it would be easier there but the problem there is two fold. One, many city girls have the reputation of loving money first and love second, and they usually move to the large cities for opportunity, not out of them. I like the slower pace of a small city.
#8 While tradition is my biggest enemy now, it will be my biggest ally once we hook up in that they will stay through the troubled times better then the average westerner — that is, to a point. If you’re into wife beating or screwing around, they will leave you just as quickly.
WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – – WARNINGS – –
I imported a woman from the Philippines that, in hindsight, probably thought she loved me but it was that carrot of the life in the states that was the overriding reason, two of which are getting away from her poor life and the other is money.
8 years later we got divorced because of many factors and $250,000 later, losing my daughter who I have zero contact with, turning my life into a living frigging hell for a 5 years till I learned to let go of the anger, plus the heartache has made me single and a bachelor for the last 8 years while still looking for that allusive dream. Which is pretty simple, a woman that is average, forgiving, optimistic, young at heart, patient and understanding of which I am, and can speak at least some English.
While you could come to the conclusion from the above that I may have deserved it, or mine is an anomaly but after working at a large company for a decade that had a number of men over 40, and like myself, who didn’t have what it takes to find a decent American wife (the ones I was meeting from the states were just plain angry women), ending up going overseas. Every singe one I knew ended in divorced and taken to the cleaners just as much as I had been.
Something happens to the foreign brides, they get Americanized and when they find the profit to be made in divorce, that is when your life will start unraveling.
My advice, be very, very, very careful, and even more careful, and then extra, extra, extra careful and then don’t marry here and bring her to the states, but rather marry here and live in China. That is my intention and one I am living.
Peace
Jim
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